As a recent newlywed, I can attest to fact that dating can be an
awkward and immensely rewarding stage of life—full of joys, challenges,
temptations, and blessings. Recently J. D. Greear, Jen Wilkin, and Derek
Rishmawy discussed what pieces of advice they’d give to couples in the
dating stage.
Rishmawy, who previously served as director of college and young
adult ministries at Trinity United Presbyterian Church in Orange County,
California, offers “one general piece” of advice for couples desiring a
God-honoring relationship: be committed to the local church. This, he
says, is a key marker of a healthy Christian relationship: “The biggest
job is encouraging the other person to be in the church, plugged in,
butt in the pew, listening to preaching, [and] in godly relationships
with other people.” Failure in this doesn’t bode well, Greear adds.
According to Rishmawy the greatest danger isn’t sexual immorality but
turning the other person or the relationship into an idol since
other sins flow from this source.
Wilkin offers a warning for those who who gladly affirm biblical
gender roles. Wilkin, who writes, speaks, and teaches women the
Bible, enourages women to be sure that a man celebrates her strengths
and doesn’t feel threatened by them. “Your strengths matter for your
marriage,” she says. “A potential husband should celebrate your
strengths and want you to flourish in things you’re good at and
to gently help you in your weaknesses.” She adds: “You should never have
to dumb yourself down to be appealing to a spouse. That seems like a
bad recipe for dating.”
Greear underscores that physical attraction can be intoxicating and misleading. He quotes Proverbs 11:22: “Like
a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman without discretion.”
Again, the church is important here, since others around the couple see
beyond the beauty (or the lack thereof) and can see character. The
pastor of The Summit Church in North Carolina wraps up
by encouraging couples to “delay and diminish the physical component of
their relationship.”
No comments:
Post a Comment